Are You Ready To Unleash Your Leadership Potential?
Perhaps you’ve been following my recent posts on Pleasing and are wondering what all the fuss is? So what if I’m a people-pleaser! It’s better to be a people pleaser and get along with others than be an antagonist who’s always rocking the boat, right? Are these the only choices?
As a leader here’s why you should be thinking about your own Need to Please.
When we have the Need to Please, our focus of control sits outside ourselves. This means that you look to others for approval of your decisions. You hold back on your ideas for innovation and improvement out of fear of being viewed as negative or critical. You take directives from you bosses and follow them – yet may not filter or intervene appropriately for your teams. You avoid conflict – which is a necessity for the refining of ideas. It is at this level of leadership where we often find group-think.
For more than 10 years, Chris Argryis and Edgar Schon have been calling for a new capacity of mind in organizations. This new mind would have the ability to author a view of how an organization should run. It would have the courage to hold that view. AND, it would be able to step outside its own viewpoint and re-author a more comprehensive view after the input of stakeholders and customers (adapted from Kegan and Lahey, Overturning the Immunity to Change). This calls for a greater capacity for mental complexity.
The research amongst developmental psychologists is telling a similar story: that the majority of leaders in position today are not at the development level that would allow them to author and re-author their own frameworks and views. There is a call for leaders to increase their capacity for complex thinking to solve the problems in these volatile, uncertain, complex, and ambiguous times (VUCA) and a need for organizational leaders with greater capacity for innovation, self-management, personal responsibility, and self-direction at every level.
The Need to Please is an adaptive behavior that is passed down in our societies and is reinforced in many of our organizational cultures.
In our upcoming Group Coaching Program, we teach you how identify to the unique way this pattern is maintained within you and how to skillfully release this pattern – opening you to the next developmental level in your leadership. We draw on research-based tools including the Immunity to Change of Robert Kegan and Lisa Lahey, we integrate Mindfulness to deeply support and integrate change, and we provide 1:1 and group coaching support for your journey.
Want to learn more about how you can get the transformation you desire? Click here to discover Women Connected Coaching and sign-up for a FREE 30-minute coaching session with me.